Innocence of Times Past

What do we remember of our childhood? It is most interesting how you will always learn new things about what you were as a child from your parents as we grow up and yet wonder why we could hardly remember that particular incident.

Recently, my mum reminded me of a wonderful habit I've always had when I was a child. Whenever we return home after an outing, the first thing I would do would be to recount and thank my mum for bringing me to all the different places as well as purchasing different things in chronological order. This, according to her, certainly brought a smile to her face.

Frankly, I have no recollection whatsoever of such a habit. But what's more important is what I realised upon reflecting on this little habit of mine in contrast to the life I'm experiencing now. It is amazing how easy it was for me to say thank you with such sincerity. The innocence of my youth is coupled with an intrinsic wisdom to truly appreciate only the good things that truly matter in life.

In contrast, we adults are more hesitant on such matters and evoke a sorry excuse of the complexity of an adult world. Yet, in this sorry state we are in, we often pile up so much frustration and nonsense in our lives that we always miss the point. In this tangled mess, we drift from our friends, our families and adopt a most pessimistic view of life and everything else.

This Christmas, let us adopt the heart of a child and be active in appreciating our family, friends, loved ones and all the great things that matter in our lives.

Then he said, "Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never get into the kingdom of heaven.Therefore, whoever humbles himself as this little child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven, and whoever receives a little child like this in my name receives me."

~ Matthew 18:3-5

An Education

From time to time, we pick up a book not to entertain ourselves but to recieve an education. For me, that book was It Doesn't Take a Genius: Five Truths to Inspire Success in Every Student by Randall MCcutcheon and Tommie Lindsey.

While it is a reference material for teachers to help them bring out the best in their students, it is also a lesson for myself for it compels me to reflect upon my life so far. It was a fanstastic journey reading the whole book in four days as I got to look myself in the hypothetical mirror and revisit certain lessons that some of the greatest teachers in my life have taught me. A tool for personal reflection as well as a trip down memory lane makes this book an absolute treat!

For those who havent read the book, I shall not divulge too much of its contents (that's because I really want you guys to read it) but I'll do a quick summary of the five truths and some of the interesting lessons I've learnt from it and how it features in my life. (A teaser plus something personal for you guys to know me better!)

First Truth: Be The First Believer

This section talks about how teachers must believe that every student is unique and it is this belief that will carry a student through despite how impossible it seems. It features various instances in which the authors stick to their beliefs about the student's ability and potential and they managed to achieve something that seemed improbable at the beginning.

How often do we find ourselves having big dreams only to be deflated by cynics or the lack of people who are willing to support you or guide you? How many times do we find ourselves speaking to someone with a polite smile whenever they talk of their aspirations? Do we truly support the group of people that we call them friends?

Sometimes, being there and believing truly means a lot. It can be a great source of strength for anyone on this confusing journey of life and something good often turns out of it. Being the first believer takes far more than saying 'I believe'. It takes every part of you to believe with utmost sincerity. Even little action of consideration goes a long way. For example, if someone tells you he wants to be a professional singer in future, just steering clear, giving him a conducive and peaceful environment while tolerating his initial screeching is a clear example of being a believer than just paying lip service.

As such, I would like to say a big Thank You to all those who believed in me. This is especially to my teachers (Mdm Annie Yong, Mrs. Geetha Creffield) who believed I could achieve before I knew for sure.

Second Truth: Class is Never Dismissed

We have always heard of the phrase life-long learning but we always forget that to learn for a lifetime, there must be someone who teaches for a lifetime! The teaching and learning never stops and all teachers must be mindful of that. This is a call for teachers to be more than just a source of guidance in the field of academics but to be the moral compass of the students. It also speaks about expecting the best of your students in order for them to improve. I particularly love the lesson about how to be champions, one must act like one and be the bigger man or woman.

Through the process of learning, we do deal with lessons about love, life and everything else. There are definitely many instances that will remain etched in my mind forever and so I've got to thank Mr. Francis Liew and Gerard Sebastian Raj for one of the best lessons about life. As promised, I shall relate to you a story that taught me about trusting and loving the people you work with in order for a successful collaboration to occur.

It was at the end of my end-year production for Arabian Nights when I was in J1. I wrote to Raj to thank him for all his patience in teaching us the dance and I apologised profusely for being rather slow in learning it which would definitely be a source of frustration for any choreographer. What was totally unexpected was the fact that he replied saying that I was never a source of frustration. In fact, he appreciates me trusting him and his craft and that is what is really needed by a choreographer from his dancers. That note certainly spurred me on to persist despite how difficult the dance is and what a performative career I had during my JC days!

Third Truth: Words Seldom Fail You

This section has more to do about academics than anything. It talks about the power of words and how it does affect students. The need to cure students of aliteracy and bring back the joys of reading. Additionally, it does offer some tips and advice to help improve students' speaking skills.

I've always been in love with words all my life and it is only now that I get to savour how great an impact words can have on people. For that, I have to thank my mum for this for she cultivated a love for reading in me albeit due to achieving a more practical benefit. When I was young and I travel with my mum on public transport, she'll often shove me a book to read throughout the journey. While it was an undeniable attempt to keep me quiet during the journey, this expedient gesture did work. Yet, to be fair, my mum does have a love for reading and she does believe in a good education. Therefore, it was a clever ploy on her part to kill two birds with one stone.

Aside from appreciating literature, the power of words does play in my personal life. I am always enamoured of sincerity and do relish some of the things and exchanges that I shared with various friends. Those things that they say to me will stay with me forevermore. I love you guys!

Fourth Truth: Writer Blocks But Rarely Tackle

This is a practical section that offers some wisdom to overcome writer's block. It is certainly interesting to see how different writers draw inspiration for writing. Yet, one of the sobering message of this section would be that great ideas need to be worked on and not by waiting for the proverbial muse. Useful tips such as doing research or approaching the experts directly for the content in your writing will certainly serve its purpose in future.

Fifth Truth: Pay Your Do's

This last truth just about rounds up all the principles in this book: Loving, Attending, Association, Persisting. (I'm sorry I can't remember all the principles at the top of my head...)

It really speaks about the need to love the people around us. To be truly there for them and to have their back all the way.

Attending speaks of the need to be there and in the moment be it in a debate, giving a speech or just plain communicating with someone. How many times have we heard one another speak but never listened? How many times have we misunderstood each other because we were not there for each other?

Associating speaks of the need to be in a proper and good company. It speaks of having students and children be around people who will guide them and inspire them the right way. As such, I'd always remember the associations I'm around with when I was with ACsian Theatre. Perhaps was is a wrong word, I'd guess I never really left.

Persisting is self-explanatory. But one of the biggest pay-offs in me persisting would be my drama career in JC. I did face a lot of problems and went into uncharted territory which can be absolutely frightening. But I do have to thank Ms. Michelle Wong, Mrs. Geetha Creffield and Gerard Sebastian Raj for being there for me all the way and in their own silent way, urging me never to give up.

Once again, thank you to everyone who have impacted me in everyway and cheers to many more years of learning, love and friendship!

The Job Interview

An office of a media company. The office is very well-furnished; a mark of a prestigious company. The interviewer is immaculately dressed while the applicant is simply but neatly dressed. Perhaps, too neatly dressed - as if he were wearing a military uniform rather than office wear. As the curtain opens and the lights come on, the applicant is seated across the table from the interviewer with his bag by the side - signalling that the interview has already begun.

Applicant:
Good Morning, Sir.

Interviewer:
A very Good Morning to you too! Thank you for your interest in a position in our Advertising Department. To start off, could you kindly tell me a little about your background and what drives you in life?

Applicant:
Sure! I come from a modest background and have been living in the heartlands all my life. As such, I've often faced ridicule from my friends who are better off than me. This little tribulation has thus strengthen my resolve to succeed and be the best in whatever I'm doing. Therefore, what drives me in life is a good challenge.

Interviewer:
Very impressive. We're off to a very nice start, aren't we? Now would you allow me to review your education record and previous work experience?

Applicant:
No problem, Sir. (removes a black folder from his bag and hands it to the interviewer)

Interviewer:
Thank you. (takes the folder, opens it and reads it. In the course of reading, he quietly mumbles some of the contents to himself)

Applicant:
As you can see sir, I have done considerably well in my studies and do work well with my peers! On several occasions, I have won many awards for myself! While it may sound like I'm boasting, I'd say, you'll never find a guy like me walking into your office everyday for an interview! (smirks)

Interview:
(nods) Well, I can see that... (turns to the last page of the folder. Reads the contents, furrow his brows, pauses in utter puzzlement)

Applicant:
Is anything the matter, Sir?

Interviewer:
While you have done well during your university days, it says here that you've got a degree in -

Applicant:
B.A. in Physical Education and Sports Science!

Interviewer:
But that has nothing to do with advertising.

Applicant:
I'm aware of that, Sir! But in the job market these days one doesn't necessarily need to have a degree in a field that they are going to work in. Look at the number of law students who decided to ditch the court and open up their own businesses! It all boils down to a steely resolve which I have!

Interviewer:
Are you aware that the position you are applying is to be a Deputy Head of the Advertising Department? (irritated) You need to have some experience in the advertising business itself! Do you know the number of applicants I've turned down who actually have a good degree in Mass Communications but have no experience! (anger builds) Are you even aware that this post requires you to head a team of about 100 in our projects! We are a prestigious media company and is unmatched everywhere in this country! We have no time to train any rookies like you even for a middle management post... let alone a top management position! What in the world made you apply for this interview in the first place!!!

Applicant:
Well Sir, I'm different! That's because I went through nine months of HELL in order to graduate! Do you know how much we were physically tortured with an utter lack of sleep, countless number of physical exercises and verbal abuse we have suffered? Only the best can endure through it! Do you know that 300 people graduated from that HELLISH bootcamp! Let me remind you sir, that it was NINE MONTHS!! Based on that Sir, I am damn well qualified for the job and I deserve all the respect I get. Therefore, you raising your voice is utterly inappropriate!

Interviewer:
GET THE HELL OUT OF MY OFFICE! Oh... and F.Y.I... I HAVE ONE BROTHER, A COUSIN AND TWO NEPHEWS WHO PASSED OUT OF THAT STUPID BOOTCAMP OF YOURS! SO YOU AIN'T THAT GREAT. NOW GET YOUR ASS OUT OF MY OFFICE!!!!

Curtains Close.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My gentle readers,

I do hope you enjoyed this little piece of scribble. While the whole thing seems incredulous, I'm sure some fellas out there have come across similar occurrences once in your life?

Thank you for taking your time to read it.

Dear Diary

"What is it about people and them keeping diaries?" quizzed my friend to a table full of guys who were generally disinterested in the question as they cook up a few non-committal speculations. After everyone chipped in their two cents worth of the subject, their heads turned towards me as they expect me to contribute to the discussion before we can proceed to another topic. Instead, I lowered my head and concentrated on my food; knowing full well that I'm the only one out of the group of four who actually does keep a diary of sorts and throwing in my chips will result in a further interrogation of why I jot down my thoughts.

But it is a good question: why do we need to collect our innermost thoughts? Do we ever write bearing in mind that it will get read by someone other than oneself? While I am not in a position to say for the others who do keep a diary or jot their thoughts down, I have no doubt that there are quite a few out there who will share the same reasons as me.

For one, the impetus to jot down my thoughts definitely stems from the innate need to express oneself in the most uninhibited way. While I value individualism as well as personal space, I do believe that we are not created to be in total isolation. That perfectly explains why since time immemorial, Man has a universal tradition of handing down stories and values to the next generation through cave paintings and the aural tradition. While indulging in this rather private affair does not share the same vein as cave painting, I guess it is an interaction with my future self.

In this interaction with my future self, I guess this self-expression is also cathartic as I spell out my feelings in some form of a rational capacity. It does preserve my sanity and calms me down at times. The process of documenting my thoughts imposes everything around me to slow down and time does not exist as I take whatever I need to write all my thoughts out. Thus, calming me down as I slip into more of a meditative mood. On the other extreme, in the event of experiencing rage, writing gives a sense of clarity to my anger. While this clarity does not dispel the brunt of my anger or its negative energy, it seems to convert it into something more productive or beneficial to me. Odd as it sounds, but there are times when I'm able to write and compose fluently in a fit of anger or perhaps create a rough sketch of something that I will undertake and develop later on. Hence, keeping this online diary seems to help me tap my emotions in a most powerful way.

At the end of the day, despite how many or how good our friends are, there are certain lines that have to be drawn. As much as we like to, we do not tell everything to even the closest of our friends for various reasons. Therefore, the diary, or in my case, the random scraps of paper that I write my thoughts on from time to time is our confidante. In this respect, it does not serve to benefit me fully. Re-reading what I wrote only has a limited effect of easing the burden inside what it comes to the need to really tell someone and having that person's opinion. This proves that inter-human relationship is still important in our isolated world of Skype, Twitter and MSN where real human interaction does not truly exist. I do wish that there is someone in which I can confide in them about EVERYTHING and they will understand despite having their own judgements and reservations. Perhaps I'm asking too much... perhaps we all just need to give a little love to make it happen.

Old Works

I often wonder why I have stopped writing poems. It is as if the poetic muse have just left me totally. Anyway, I was re-looking at my old poems and I really wonder how I managed to write then.. Here are some of my favs...

Yearnings

(I)

At dawn's breath
I went to the meadows;
accompanied by the gay of yester-shadows.
Each step forward,
less of a gay the shadows be,
Each step forward,
how long before I have thee?


(II)

Standing by the window
on a moonless night,
A comforting breeze blows,
as I think of you.
Silence wreaks throught the air;
only to be destroyed by the crickets.
So do my thoughts;
as I think of you.


(III)

A dreary morn I wake;
to find the sun sagging as
he reflects the frost-bitten pavement of winter's dusk.
I dragged my feet on the deserted street;
for no rhytmic beat was present;
upon the streets of pristine snow.

No song did the lark sing,
for no joy did winter bring.

I yearn for the oncoming summer;
whose smiles is warm like yours
and whose joy radiates into celestial realms.

So come quickly, my lovely summer.
For one's embrace warms the yearning heart.

Bark Scratching

In the months of the monsoonal rains,
I hear the cacophony created by these little beings pelting against my window sill.
A petit being I was, as I peered out of my doorway with aching pains,
Making sure the house is still,
I trod along the moisten path and lay bare upon the moist-smitten trees.


Scratching on the dark, rocky barks,
I lay myself in fervent stark,
Till I was weary,
I sat upon the dreary
Roots of that old tree
Thinking that I’ll be free
And wondering will anyone see
My scratching on that old, dark tree.

Well.. tell me what you think!